Please, as my friend, do not tell pregnant women that they are HUGE...
Now, I know that I have put my foot in my mouth a few times in my life but I hope that I have never offended or hurt someone by drawing negative attention to them about their weight or by making them feel uncomfortable in any way.
Although I have often referred to myself as being HUGE during this pregnancy, it's not something a pregnant person wants to hear from someone else whether it's a friend, family member, or stranger. As if our society isn't obsessed enough with weight, and it isn't sick enough that our little girls think they are fat before they start kindergarten, women should not have to feel ashamed for growing a big belly during pregnancy.
Throughout this pregnancy, I have been very self-conscious about my weight and the size of my belly. Until now, I haven't exactly broad casted that tidbit of information, as sharing the things I am self-conscious about isn't something I normally do. If I can save one pregnant person, however, from feeling the way I felt today...then I am glad to share my story.
Between yesterday and today, I was told that I was "just HUGE" at least a dozen times. Not only was I referred to as HUGE over and over, but I was referred to as the BIG lady getting out of the car and told that I was going to have a BIG baby because I am so BIG. I wish I could tell you that these comments came from a total stranger, but believe it or not, they came from someone I know well. I also wish I could tell you that this is the only person who has made these comments to me, but the truth is that I have heard these types of comments since I was 8 weeks pregnant. Here are a few of my favorites...
-"How far along are you? Oh, you look a lot farther along than that."
-"When is your due date? Oh, you look like you are ready now."
-"When is that baby coming? That long yet? You look miserably uncomfortable!"
-"Wow, you're huge! How big were your other kids?"
-"Wow, you must be about ready to pop! Oh really, 3 more months to go, huh?"
-"Maybe you're having twins."
Although much of this is probably meant to be good humor, what people don't realize is what I went through to get where I am...
-Ectopic pregnancy in January 2008, which resulted in a 5+ pound weight gain because my hormones were confused and I'm pretty sure I was depressed. Hello! My husband was out of state until April, I was taking care of two kids by myself and working full-time, and dealing with my pregnancy loss ALONE.
-Clomid in May 2008, which spells "weight gain" for me of at least 10 pounds (Clomid is a fertility drug that we have to use to get pregnant). The same thing happened with Logan.
-Pregnancy in June 2008 and then a miscarriage in August 2008, which resulted in more weight gain.
-Clomid in September 2008, and guess what that spells.
-My current pregnancy as of September 2008, and I have only gained 26 pounds so far (as of today at my 34-week checkup). My doctor assures me that I am doing well with my weight gain.
So, I hope you can understand why I just want to be PROUD of my very BIG belly. Please remember me when you are talking to your wife, your sister, your friend, or a complete stranger who is pregnant. Few women can wear their same jeans their entire pregnancy, even fewer get no stretch marks, and like women...babies come in all sizes and still, they are miracles!
Although I have often referred to myself as being HUGE during this pregnancy, it's not something a pregnant person wants to hear from someone else whether it's a friend, family member, or stranger. As if our society isn't obsessed enough with weight, and it isn't sick enough that our little girls think they are fat before they start kindergarten, women should not have to feel ashamed for growing a big belly during pregnancy.
Throughout this pregnancy, I have been very self-conscious about my weight and the size of my belly. Until now, I haven't exactly broad casted that tidbit of information, as sharing the things I am self-conscious about isn't something I normally do. If I can save one pregnant person, however, from feeling the way I felt today...then I am glad to share my story.
Between yesterday and today, I was told that I was "just HUGE" at least a dozen times. Not only was I referred to as HUGE over and over, but I was referred to as the BIG lady getting out of the car and told that I was going to have a BIG baby because I am so BIG. I wish I could tell you that these comments came from a total stranger, but believe it or not, they came from someone I know well. I also wish I could tell you that this is the only person who has made these comments to me, but the truth is that I have heard these types of comments since I was 8 weeks pregnant. Here are a few of my favorites...
-"How far along are you? Oh, you look a lot farther along than that."
-"When is your due date? Oh, you look like you are ready now."
-"When is that baby coming? That long yet? You look miserably uncomfortable!"
-"Wow, you're huge! How big were your other kids?"
-"Wow, you must be about ready to pop! Oh really, 3 more months to go, huh?"
-"Maybe you're having twins."
Although much of this is probably meant to be good humor, what people don't realize is what I went through to get where I am...
-Ectopic pregnancy in January 2008, which resulted in a 5+ pound weight gain because my hormones were confused and I'm pretty sure I was depressed. Hello! My husband was out of state until April, I was taking care of two kids by myself and working full-time, and dealing with my pregnancy loss ALONE.
-Clomid in May 2008, which spells "weight gain" for me of at least 10 pounds (Clomid is a fertility drug that we have to use to get pregnant). The same thing happened with Logan.
-Pregnancy in June 2008 and then a miscarriage in August 2008, which resulted in more weight gain.
-Clomid in September 2008, and guess what that spells.
-My current pregnancy as of September 2008, and I have only gained 26 pounds so far (as of today at my 34-week checkup). My doctor assures me that I am doing well with my weight gain.
So, I hope you can understand why I just want to be PROUD of my very BIG belly. Please remember me when you are talking to your wife, your sister, your friend, or a complete stranger who is pregnant. Few women can wear their same jeans their entire pregnancy, even fewer get no stretch marks, and like women...babies come in all sizes and still, they are miracles!
I grow people. What's your super power?
I'm not fat. I'm knocked up!
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I'm not fat. I'm knocked up!
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1 comment:
I couldn't agree more! I'm only 19 weeks and everyday at least one person tells me how BIG or HUGE I am and says "You must be having twins!" UGH!
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